Sofa Saga

As I have related here, I have designated our Florida home our “forever home.”  Of course, at our age, that’s a bit premature but for the foreseeable future, which I hope is many years, Stoneybrook is it.  Occasionally, we look at other homes closer to the beach or downtown Venice, but we always come home and say, “we love it here.”

In April, I began the redo.  First, the grandkids room, then the guest room, then the office and now the “great” room….the living, dining, kitchen “open concept” at its finest, opening to the pool and the woods.  The view of our little tropical paradise.

Got rid of the counter top dining set and replaced it with a white round table coastal style with six seagrass woven chairs.  Check.  Now to attack the living room.  The white sofa had to go.

The great sofa hunt began on a Sunday afternoon.  BH mentioned that Baer’s was having a big sale.  That’s all I had to hear.  I had my heart set on a leather power reclining sofa.  Why?  Because his daughter added a movie room in her basement and we had just been there and I fell in love with those movie chairs.

When we were on vacation in South Carolina, the local cinema had re-outfitted its theaters with those marvelous reclining chairs.  We loved them so much, we went to see movies we had absolutely no intention of seeing just so we could recline in comfort.

I had visions of installing that kind of luxury in my own living space.  A furniture store can be a bit overwhelming to me, but, at least, I had a germ of an idea.  For about two hours, we amused ourselves with those recliner buttons seeking the one that was ‘it.’  And find it, we did.  But, naturally, it is not in BH’s DNA to buy it.  We needed to look around and see if we could find a better bargain online.

Back to Costco online.  And, there it was.  A savings of $400.  BH wanted to pull the trigger.  I agreed. Delivery was scheduled for the next week.  I am over the moon!  So excited!  However, there was a catch.  The sofa was boxed and weighed 340 pounds and they would only deliver it to the threshold of the front door.

Even BH was worried about the 340 pounds.  How to get the box all the way into the living room, then assemble it.  Hmmm….reading and following directions are not my strong suits, but he is much better than me.  A neighbor was enlisted ….also in our senior category.  But, we prevailed.  An hour later, we had a power sofa.

I pushed the buttons on the left side.  Nothing.  I pushed the buttons on the right side.  Nothing.  The damn thing didn’t work.  Not only that, it was the most uncomfortable sofa I had ever sat on.  It was as comfortable as a stone bench.

BH called Costco and told them we didn’t want it.  “You need to rebox it,” was the reply.  The manufacturer would call in a few days to set up a pick up date.  Sometimes, you just have to laugh.  REBOX THIS THING?  Ironically, we were thrilled the sofa had been delivered on recycling day so that box was long gone.  He even called UPS who could send us a box but it wouldn’t be there for a week or more.  Put a hold on that.

The manufacturer called a couple of days later, arranged a pick up day with a 12 hour window (8 am to 8 pm) and we were clear with them that it wasn’t boxed.  “Just take apart the sofa and push it back to the front door.”  Of course, we were a bit nervous that we’d push that monstrosity back to the front door and they wouldn’t take it because it wasn’t boxed.

Back to the drawing board.  We needed a sofa.  By this time, it was Labor Day weekend…furniture sales galore.  It was a long day, strolling through furniture store after furniture store looking for a new power reclining sofa, taking pictures of our favorites.  The last store we visited was Baer’s.  And, there it was.  The one I loved from the beginning.  BH agreed.  The best part of this deal is they moved it all the way into the house and would set it up.  These are the little details I neglected to think about originally.

Meanwhile, we still had that monster in our house that we had to get rid of.  However, they were true to their word.  The pick up guys came, got that thing loaded up and out of our house in three minutes.  And, now, our happy sofa has moved in and will be appreciated forever.

Why, I ever agreed to getting that sofa online I will never understand.  Who buys a sofa without sitting on it?!  One of my dumber moves.   But, quite the saga.

No Good Deed

You know the rest….no good deed goes unpunished.  At least, I think that’s the phrasing.  Decades when I was down to quarters in my bank account (Truth!), I joined the Southern Poverty Law Center and supported public television.  But, I believed in doing that.  And, although, my contribution to PBS has elapsed, I still am a stalwart donor to SPLC.

And, there’s the rub.  There is not a day that goes by that I am not reminded by them to up my membership.  I get countless notices by mail and email.  They send me their teaching materials, their books and their newsletters.  And, I’m grateful that they exist and do the important work they do.  But, I cannot read any of it.  Why?  Because it depresses the hell out of me.

It just reminds me that the more things change, the more they stay the same.  The segregation and violence of my youth back in the 50s has been replaced by the same racist and hateful incidents of today and openly sanctioned by the President of the allegedly Free World.

And, so, I do what I can to make the world a better place.  In my case, it’s making contributions to organizations like Oxfam and the League of Women Voters.  Causes that support environmental concerns and world hunger.  And what happens as a result?  More of the same.  Every similar cause appears in my mailbox asking for my support, sending me free address labels so I’ll feel guilty every time I use them if I don’t pay up.

Then, there are the online orders.  I practically order everything online.  I know I’m one of millions responsible for the demise of malls and shopping centers but, because I can’t walk for miles anymore, I have a good excuse.  I am a fan of overstock.com and have spent a fair amount on rugs, pillows and other household goods.  But, does that give Joss & Main and Wayfair an excuse to clutter up my promotions mailbox?

I bet you’re thinking….just unsubscribe.  Oh yeah….sounds so easy.  I cannot tell you the number of times I have unsubscribed only to have them continue the onslaught the next week!  Not to speak of the unreasonable of sites I need to unsubscribe.  Where to begin?!!

And then there are the Democrats.  Of which I am one.  Yes, I donate monthly to Act Blue.  Trust me, I am definitely rethinking that.  Now, I am ripe for every “emergency” in every political race in every state in the union.  If I contribute that day, it will be matched by 2x, 3x, 5x, 10x.  I was a sucker for about a month then I got jaded.  Are you kidding me?  My monthly contribution isn’t enough?  Really?  I just don’t trust what you’re sending me!  In the time I’ve been writing this, I’ve received 10 requests for ‘mo money ‘mo money!

I have even sent money to some of the candidates, so I am one of the minimum 130,000 for four candidates all of whom ended up on the stage last week.  Kamala, Elizabeth, Pete and Beto have all benefitted by my meager support, but, evidently, that wasn’t enough because my new best friends need to reach out to me multiple times a day!  It’s just a bit overwhelming.  All this love….

Did someone think email was a good idea?  I use it, of course, but how often do you actually get an email you actually want to read?  Especially, now that I’m retired and not required to read any work related stuff, I can count on one hand any truly important emails I get in a month.  The most enjoyable ones are from you, my friends.

This morning, I did a huge dump.  Hmmm…maybe that wasn’t the best choice of words.  I actually dumped about 300 emails into the trash.  And since I’ve been writing this, I’ve received 30 emails that I will never read and will be dumped as well.

All in all, I want to do my part.  I want to support causes that make a positive difference in the world.  I just don’t want to be punished by a never-ending bombardment of mail and emails for what I think is doing the right thing.

Is He or Isn't He?

Well, he certainly is taking his sweet time.  Threatening to throw chaos into countless lives, including mine.  You know who I’m talking about.  That Dorian.  Dorian, supposedly a unisex name, although there is no record of any female being named Dorian since 1880.  That may change if a baby is conceived during this event.  You know how that goes.

Today, I am 72.  How the hell did that happen?  I guess the important thing is that it did. Grateful for that.  Fifty years ago, I thought people in their 70s were all senile and decrepit.  Ahhh….youth can be pretty ignorant.  What did I know?  Not much.  And, now, getting out of bed can be a bit of an adventure, but I can’t wait to start a new day!

This was my East Coast Florida week.  I couldn’t wait to go back to Neptune Beach, a little north of Jax Beach.  I love that place…great food, great music, and best of all the oceanside room.  Is there anything better than being lulled to sleep by those waves crashing in rhythm?

Dorian was just sitting there like a bump on a log out in the Caribbean so we were packed and set to go. Just looked like rain and a little wind to me.  I called the hotel Sunday to check in only to be told we would be the only guests there.  Okay, I’m fine with that.  Visions of being pampered and having every need attended to.

Two hours later, I got an urgent phone call and countless emails telling me not to come and if I’m on my way to turn around and find another place to stay.  They were being evacuated.  OMG!  I cannot tell you how bummed BH was.  Why?  Because he really wanted to experience a hurricane.

A few years ago, we were supposed to go to a destination wedding in Montego Bay with a hurricane threatening to break up the happy party.  He went.  I stayed home.  I do not do hurricanes.  The day he got there they shut down the hotel and he got the last seat out on the last flight out. He had really wanted to stay.

Next came the call from Expedia telling me St. Augustine Beach was also evacuated.  Dadgummit!!  I have not been to St. Augustine in 60 years and really wanted to relish in its history, which, of course, I would not have been able to do this week anyway.

As you are probably well aware, I had already handed over my money to Expedia and even though Dorian had canceled my nights, Expedia was not handing back my money.  What to do?  What to do?  Where else would you like to go, they implored.  Hmmm…I’ve always wanted to go back to Marco Island to explore that area.  I can always pretend to be a muckety muck.

Are you watching the weather channel?  Every three hours, there’s a “new” report.  BH thinks
it’s the best job in the world…you can be consistently wrong and keep you job.  Me?  I would go crazy trying to think of a different way to say the same thing over and over.  Especially with this storm which is the slowest moving storm ever.  Whoever heard of a storm moving a 1 mile per hour?  At this rate, it’ll end up in Boston for Christmas!

So, tomorrow, we leave for Marco for a couple of nights on the water albeit west coast water, whose waves are not going to lull me to sleep.  But, we will eat, drink, be merry and love our happy birthday visit!