Retirement Uniform

I have always loved clothes.  To think of what I’ve spent during this lifetime makes me shudder.  Never have I bought designer stuff.  Definitely way out of my league, but I have certainly enriched Ann Taylor, Eileen Fisher, Talbot’s, and Garnett Hill quite generously.  Happy birthday to me several times a year.

Of course, I was working then, needing a ‘professional’ wardrobe with goo gobs of shoes, purses, accessories.  That wardrobe filled two walk-in closets.  Some of it I wore constantly; some of it I rarely wore.  Didn’t like it after I got it home.  Too tight.  Too loose.

I prided myself on cleaning out my closets every spring and fall.  God only knows how much I gave to Goodwill.  And, I didn’t think twice about it.  I’m sure I would sob if I added up how much those clothes cost that I cavalierly gave away.  At least, someone could surely use them, I’d rationalize.

Then, I retired.  I emptied those closets like a madwoman.  I am never going back to my day job.  I kept almost nothing.  A few tops, sweaters, pairs of pants.  A couple of dresses, one suit.  Two bathing suits.  I buy nothing nor can I afford to.  This week I am salivating over the Sundance catalog.  I love every piece of jewelry in there.  Secretly, I am coveting a top in there that I will gift myself if my house actually goes to settlement this month.  If not, oh well….the prices are nothing less than obscene anyway.

I have a retirement uniform.  Every morning, I get up and put on a black beach dress with a white starfish on the front.  I bought it at Fresh Produce in Hilton Head probably 10 years ago.  If I don’t have to go anywhere, I’ll wear if all day.  Remember the ‘house dresses’ our stay-at-home mothers used to wear everyday?  It’s a step up from that….barely.  But, I love it.  I make my coffee, read the paper and then move on to my daily workout.

I change into my other uniform:  my Life Is Good yoga pants and matching Good Karma tee shirt.  I’ve owned them forever…found the pants in North Carolina, and the shirt in Utah.  Truly, the most comfortable clothes ever.  The down side is I can’t wear them in public.  The pants have a tear across the back end and the shirt is stained with blueberry juice.  I cannot tell you how many times I’ve tried to find them on eBay or anywhere on the internet.  Life is Good stopped making the Good Karma line, so I’m out of luck.  I still love them.

Does BH care?  Are you kidding me?  He thinks whatever I wear is charming, if not sexy.  But, then, his retirement uniform is some Orioles give away tee shirt and cut off jeans from Walmart.  I think he’s only wore long jeans down here twice in six months.  We are the epitome of country casual.  Or maybe just country.

That shoe fetish I had is over.  Now, I wear Sanuk yoga mat flip flops.  Made from yoga mats, very cushiony….very good for wearing on tile floors.  If I dress up, I wear the yoga mat one inch heels.  Am I a sexy senior or what?

I remember my love coach suggested I wear scoop neck tops in warm colors.  I think the point was to be a tad bit suggestive, show some cleavage.  The assumption being I had some cleavage.  Ha!  Where’s my Wonderbra?  Well….I didn’t wear the low neck tops, invest in push-up bras or dye my hair.

And, somehow, I ended up just fine being me, living a good life in my very ‘relaxed’ beach dress, flopping around in my yoga mat sandals.  I don’t miss that wardrobe one bit!